Kegs ‘n Eggs is now a year old, everyone!

Crowd slowly applauses, people look around at each other, most have no idea what the hell Kegs ‘n Eggs is but they smile and clap anyways.

To celebrate our 1-year anniversary, I took a trip down memory lane in hopes of revamping one of my favorite blog posts/topics of all-time – Tailgating. Last year, I debuted with some dos and don’ts when it comes to gameday prep and hope to build off the momentum we started last year.

Amid conference turmoil, season predictions, sanction and more, tailgating remains the sacred epicenter of college football that gives us the force to give Saturdays our all. (Imagine James Earl Jones narrating this to you while giving Hook ‘em Horns and pounding a PBR <— Ahhhh, much better).

Thanks to everyone that has stopped by in the past year. Here’s to you and a new season on the horizon. Raise glass (actually it’s a lukewarm Ice House).

Cheers.

DO: Set your alarm clock for that Saturday morning at least three times. You’ll likely be hungover, so plan a few precautionary snoozes accordingly.

DON’T: Don’t go hog wild with the hard stuff too early. A Bloody Mary or even a good morning shot of your favorite liquor is a fine idea. Anything more early on can force the finest tailgaters into an early retirement. You have all day to make poor decisions. Make sure you make it all day.

DO: Bring more than enough tailgating materials for you, your group, and stragglers. There will always be stragglers, folks. Don’t let someone’s lack of preparation ruin yours. Instead, be the champion that you are and hand that awkward guy in the corner a beer and a pat on the bat.

DON’T: Counting on making a late day beer run is asinine. Not buying enough of tasty goodness can ruin weekends. I cannot stress this enough, don’t come up short when it comes to beverages.

DO: Bring a football. If you didn’t know that, “DO” punch yourself in the groin.

DON’T: Making food “the” priority versus a good stomach base is a classic mistake. 1) Don’t buy some vintage/expensive meat that you make at  family gatherings. And 2) Eating too much can take out a good chunk of the day due to heartburn.

DO: Dress Code Ethics: I am open when it comes to apparel. Old school helmets, obscene outfits, etc – but make sure you’re built to sustain the weather. Too much clothing can be deadly early on in the football season so be wary.

DON’T: Please God don’t go shirtless. We get it, you have a 6-pack. Now, kindly go fail miserably hitting on freshmen talent and fade away into the tailgating oblivion. There’s no room for this kind of DON’T.

DO: Know your fight songs, people. Holding up one arm and mumbling might seem like your fitting in, but I’ll target you from a mile away.

DON’T: Puking isn’t a topic people like, but we’re not afraid. There’s nothing wrong with sneaking off somewhere and taking care of business if you have to. If you do take this route, DON’T act like you’re God afterwards and don’t go into lame mode.

DO: On that note, gum is a always a good idea.

DON’T: Forgetting chairs might not sound like something you would do, but I see this at almost every tailgate. Just like beverages, every person should have a chair, stool, inflatable couch, or full beer case to sit on to  keep legs fresh.

DO: At one point in the day, or even the season, try and kick an empty beer can through a miniature field goal. There might not be anything more fun than this on the entire planet.

DON’T: Getting tackled over a cooler, even if it’s all in good fun, isn’t a good way to keep a good tailgate going. After all, you could get John Deere’d to an Iowa Hospital and miss the first half of a HUGE football game getting x-rays. #learnfromourmistakes

DO: Shotguns. Not the gun, the art of using your keys to create a small hole in your beer can and chug. For the true man, try a Teen Wolf. Bite the hole in your can and chug in the same fantastic motion.

DON’T: Beer bongs. They take up space, there’s a 75% chance you’ll lose it, plus think about all the mouths that could be entering the equation. #playitsafe

DO: Charge your phones. If you or someone you know “makes a game extra interesting,” you’ll need those cell phone bats, folks. Plus, if you get stranded at 2 AM wandering around campus, this could be your lone life line when you come out of your blackout.

DON’T: Fighting cannot be tolerated at tailgates. They’re distracting and could end the day quickly if bike cops pedal over at the wrong time. You don’t need to be maced at a tailgate unless it’s for a bet. Then, well, consider it.

DO: Be friendly, perhaps overly friendly. The season is too short and the offseason is too long to act like an anus. You are likely at one of the largest parties in the country, have more fun than you should and celebrate this glorious day with anyone that looks approachable.

DON’T: Even yours truly has committed plenty o’ tailgating DON’Ts. Take this photo below. 1 AM, Iowa City Bar, in the midst of ending a glorious/hard fought day, and I throw up a Hook ‘Em Horns while wearing a glorious Fred Russel jersey? Not to mention that I tried, keyword here is “tried” to look like a bad ass. WTF was I doing? Learn from my mistakes and turn off all cameras after 7 PM, aka the time where things start to spiral out of control. FACEPALM.

DO: Enjoy the season, gang. It’s almost here and I cannot wait to get things going. Have fun, be safe, tune in here when you want a brief batch of informative (debatable) entertainment, and let’s do it up right in 2010.

College football is 2 weeks away…

Get them DVRs ready, football fans. Mike Leach is coming back to football. Well, kind of.

Everyone’s favorite sound bite has agreed to become an analyst on CBS College Sports. And while this isn’t exactly a network built around marquee matchups and excitement, Leach is expected to bring plenty of that with his commentary.

Leach is still in the middle of a lawsuit with the university after the Adam James debacle and has spent more time at Hog’s Breath Saloon and chartering fishing boats than he has actively seeking jobs.

With that said, Leach instantly provides an edginess and unpredictability to the broadcast that Jason Sehorn just cannot provide and will almost force us to tune into seemingly meaningless Navy and Army blowouts.

How long this experiment will actually last will be interesting, and everyone will have to wait and see if the coach can handle booth restrictions.

After all, this is the man that brought us…

And…

And finally.. (courtesy of Barking Carnival)

We can only hope that Leach lets it all hang out when it comes to game analysis. Simply looking at Leach’s history, I feel fairly confident he’ll give us plenty to talk about.

The agent epidemic and the connection between the NCAA and the NFL came full circle on Thursday afternoon as some of the greatest minds (and egos) in football discussed things over.

Included in this group session that occurred over a conference call were: Nick Saban, Urban Meyer, Jim Tressel, Mack Brown, Bob Stoops, along with NFL commish Roger Goodell.

Saban’s backlash against agents, and more recently NFL scouts, has been well documented. He recently banned NFL scouts from team practices and he’s backing up his strong words at the SEC Media Days where he referred to ”unscrupulous” agents as pimps. He also fired off the following when looking at ways to repair the situation.

“We’re all trying to put our heads together to figure out what we can do to level the playing field so that everybody that’s in the agent community – which some of them are very professional – have the same opportunity to recruit players and that the bootleggers out there are guys that get punished and penalized.”

While nothing has been publicly decided, the coaches aren’t only focusing on the agents’ impact on this situation. After all, players are certainly at fault and aware of consequences that may come about.

“You would think that the player would know that if a professional person who is an agent is willing to break the rules to represent him, why does he think that the guy won’t break the rules if he isn’t representing him?” Saban commented. “That’s the part that’s hard for me to fathom. As soon as a guy broke a rule, I would leave and say, ‘That guy’s not representing me. I don’t want anything to do with him. I’m not even going to call him back.”

Harsher punishments for both the agents and the players would likely eliminate this issue altogether, IF the punishments were harsh enough.

Forcing the player to wait longer for their NFL meal ticket, aka applying long-term suspensions spanning the NCAA and NFL time spans would deter them from risking anything, particularly those that are juniors or seniors. Possible? Probably not, but Goodell is listening and a giant piece of the process.

As for the agents, putting their careers on the line would force them to step back. Like the players, these penalties could have lingering effects that could hurt their chances of landing future jobs if they were fired as the result of the incident.

In general, the attention that has already been created regarding this contact and the forthcoming suspensions for some of the NCAA’s most prominent players will likely change how many view the current situation.

With that said, Saban isn’t the type to go quietly into the night.